Why is Skype flirting such a big deal, anyway?
We often think of Skype flirting as something only teenagers would do. Yet that isn’t, and shouldn’t really be the case! University of Brisbane study of 164 married couples showed that flirting was instrumental in creating and maintaining intimacy. Researcher Brandi Frisby called it a way to “create a private world with the spouse.”
If that sounds like something you want to have (and who among us doesn’t?) Then read on!
Of course, we know that there are tremendous health benefits to maintaining a fun, flirty relationship whether you’re a teenager, married for ten years, or in a long distance relationship. But why do it over Skype?
Well, simply put, because it’s there! Everyone has it, it’s easy to use, and it can be extremely thrilling. You can text, call, video chat, send over instant snapshots of your day and lots more!
The three basic rules to flirting on Skype
While it’s clear that it can be all fun and games, it may not be immediately obvious how to proceed. Whenever we flirt on Skype, we’re missing some of the major options for sending flirty cues to our partner. Things such as prolonged eye contact or suggestive touches are off the table.
To compensate, all you need to do is follow these three simple rules:
1. Be as in-depth as you can
Whenever you’re being told a story, ask questions. Don’t be afraid to ask details about how your partner was feeling. When he’s expressing an opinion, listen. Really focus and listen and try to remember. Looking deeply into them as a person is what we can use to replace looking deeply into their eyes, so don’t be stingy with your attention. This doesn’t mean to be obsessive, or to demand a large amount of information, but simply to focus on a high quality of it.
2. Be literate, not pictographic
While it may be tempting to embellish your messages with smiley faces every now and then, adding winks after every single sentence will not turn it into a flirtatious success. Remember that emotions are just emoticons, cheap and easy to use whenever you don’t feel like saying something properly. Considering the added challenge of expressing deep feelings over Skype, you should definitely steer clear of anything cheap and easy!
3. Be creative
There are a million ways to use words, photos, videos, and audio clips to surprise and thrill your partner. There’s no need to stick to the basics in this situation! Use Skype as your own personal carrier pigeon for love notes during class or work hours, or record good morning messages every night for your partner to hear first thing in the morning. There’s a lot you can do with this versatile tool, so explore it!
For more Skype ideas, take a look at our other popuar page > 7 awesome things to do in a long distance relationship over Skype – We feature the top rated games to play over skype and the memorbale things you can do during your online date.
First time Skype flirting: The things you should know
After lots of collective experience on successful and not so successful Skype flirting, we’ve put together this list of things we wished we had known before we ever started. Hopefully they will help you along and prevent you from making some common mistakes!
1. You have an obligation to respect the person on the other side
That mainly means respecting their privacy. The conversations you have or photos they send you should be sacred to you, and never ever shared with anyone else under any circumstances. No, not even your best friend.
2. But don’t assume you will always be respected
Especially in the case of people you’ve just met, or just started chatting with, it’s better to be safe than sorry. For a little while, until you get to know them, assume that everything you say and do IS being copied to their best friend. At least.
3. Don’t put all of your eggs in one basket
It’s always possible that you prepare a big evening of chatting and fun with your partner over Skype, and there’s a storm that wipes out the electricity in your area. And you forgot to charge your laptop. No joke, it happened to us. It’s easy to get disappointed if you don’t have a backup plan, or at least the possibility of a rain check.
4. Don’t be a thief
Of anyone’s words. While we are great fans of taking suggestions and inspiration from outside sources, what you say has to belong to you. Not only because sooner or later the truth will come out, usually violently, but also because you’ll feel like much less of a success if you didn’t really do it yourself.
5. Don’t underestimate the power of the love note
You may be planning over-complicated setups that involve video editing and a dancing gorilla right now, but you need to remember that a very simple, unexpected “you’re a wonderful person” can be an uplifting note in the middle of a gray day that will be cherished.
6. Be extra careful when sending anything risque
And we’re not just talking about trusting the person you’re talking with. We’re talking about being extra careful of sending the right message to the right person… especially when you’re trying to flirt with someone who shares a first name with your grandmother.
7. Always take it with a sense of humor
Your first attempts at romance over Skype may be clumsy, your spouses even more so. It’s a learning process, but luckily there aren’t any tests involved! Accept that some moments will bring more laughter than intimacy, since that’s still a great result anyway, and you will be fine.
Can Skype flirting be an awesome idea for me and my partner?
Of course it can! As long as you keep respect and a spirit of fun in mind, there’s no reason why this shouldn’t be for you.
It only takes a moment to send a flirty thought, and a picture can make a lasting impression. It can be the start of a wonderful relationship, or a great addition to an already flourishing one. The only prerequisites? A sense of humor, a sense of adventure… and an internet connection.
Love that you can send from wherever you are to wherever you want it to be.
Words by: Alexandra Pana
Picture: Billy Huynh